Everything went bad

Today I had my observation group study at the airport with Nick and Peter.
Nick was waiting on the Cafe Rosso. As soon as he Peter he made this huge unhappy face, I just did not know what to say. Then, Peter asked Nick is your car big enough and he said "No" it can only hold two people and Peter made this awful face and said "oh" I'll get my car . Later, he said I'm just kidding, but throughout the whole day he keep on making comments that he was not pleased that Peter came along.

MY GOLDFISH IS GROWING TOO BIG too fast ;(

Although Goldie eats a lot, and grows fast for my small fish tank, he is beautiful.
I had a horrible day at work the other day. I was just sick; i wanted to threw up just by the smell of certain food. sweaty, feeling heavy made me notice to that I was sick.
Raul decided not to talk to me so far. I haven't receive a single text message from him since i stood him up the other Saturday ;(
I fought a lot with Francis over attention issues. But he will pay ;)
I receive a good grade in my final Psychology class :0
Peter lend me his labtop how nice, but i will give it back ;(

Revenge against all the bitches in my house :)

I need a time out. I really did not like what "they" did to me. I guess in a way their treatment always made me feel like noone can love me, and its reciprocal; i cannot love anybody back either. Everytime, I try to love someone and i get lied to then, i find the way to hurt them. It justs makes me feel better, but eventually I hurt my self for having some type of relief in my own "home Pains" out of making people suffer. Eveytime, I make someone cry; I get the strange illusion that maybe i would feel better if it was my family crying, but its not and so I feel no remorse. Then, I get depressed but never guilty. One example Raul called me today and pretend to see him but i left him there standing there. I saw his face, but i felt nothing. I turned my back and I felt like I have a fever and my hands were sweating. I told myself I shoudnot have let him waiting like an idiot but thats what they did to me that what i do now. My friendship with Raul is over because from now on i would only hurt him is better if he goes away.

Is taking few days to process what I feel

AnGrY

I'm depressed. I feel VASTLY not included; I am just a tenant again. Things like this always gets the best of me. Makes me wants my dad more, still I cannot longer laid back on a wishful thinking; I must do something for this to change. In the beginning, they told me that they were at the grocery store buying supplies at about 3:30pm. Then, at 4:30pm I called them back, and she told me that they were going to Costco to get my sister with the kids. I said okay. They should of told me that they could not get me, so I would of done something to get out work and stop waiting like an idiot. 5:30 called back and realized something was wrong, I started yelling and told them that I was gonna wait for a little longer, but then Sonia told me that they were gonna take a little longer, and i said why? And she said my mom did not tell you. I thought God the truth is finally coming. She said, We are taking pictures and we are still eating so you have to wait a little bit more, but i told her why you guys did not tell me and she hung up. Wendy sat down with me and told me: its time for you to stop being depending on us, you must take your own path, I do not want to see this happen again. I looked at her and said yeah like it is my fault. She keep on saying, If you down grow up, you are just going to suffer. Please be a grown woman and wake up down let “them” take you down. I would take a couple of days to think. I need to get away from friends and even from my own boyfriend; i need time for me. I need to evaluate my life for sure. Perhaps, Wendy has bias about my well being; she just wants the room, but she always says a little about the truth. Her words, always contain some summary of what she is observing. She might have a bias, but in the end she talks because she has evidence to prove her statements.
Fairy picture.